The Akron Beacon-Journal has had some beauts lately. One of my favorites was the New Funko Pop Collection “honoring” Dolly Parton. Now Dolly has received just about every honor that a country/pop/r&r singer is likely to be nominated for. She’s been in the movies and on TV and received national recognition for her performance and her song-writing and her general doing of good works (giving books to kids all over the country, for instance), DollyWood down in Tennessee seems to be thriving. Is a Funko Pop doll something that she really needs to adorn her already feathered cap? What is the Funko stuff, anyway?
Looking them up online yields a shot–or two or three or more–of something referred to as “stranger things”, and–Yup–they were…stranger, that is. A quote from another site says, “Funko is a pop culture lifestyle brand.” Who would want to look like these little critters ? Big heads (no shortage of those around, anyway), small bodies, big eyes, little triangular noses, no mouths most of the time, all sorts of outfits (Buy ‘em all!). Definitely stranger. (At $12 apiece !) And the regular prices for the things are amazing. People actually pay plenty more than the Dolly figure is listed at. Some of the little items are really strange and somebody is making a bundle on weirdness…not that this is anything new.
The Dolly Parton addition to this array of “pop culture lifestyle” icons is pictured in the AB-J . In one of the two models offered, Dolly appears in a “white, rhinestone-studded pantsuit, holding a rhinestone-studded guitar”. The other model Dolly is in “an orange-fringed glitter jumpsuit with a silver banjo”. Say, just what every child wants to look like, right? The company’s vice president of marketing made a statement that sums it all up, “At Funko we are always looking for innovative ways to not only surprise our devoted fanbase but grow our audience through new collections and exciting pop culture collaborations.” What suckers collect this stuff?
Besides, if the pix are anywhere near accurate, the Dolly pictured does not really display her most-storied attractions, if you get my drift–too covered up; the platform sandals are a nice touch, though. Like one of my favorite “Dolly-isms”, “It costs a lot to look this cheap.”
Moving along now…there was a page on ways to keep your New Year’s resolutions. I seldom do those, myself. I’m too unreliable. Anyway, the suggestions included some real interesting possibilities. For instance, healthier, or at least different, things to eat and places to eat them–heavy on the healthful side–vegan menus, smoothies, sea moss gummies (yum) and all that sort of thing (Not a stuffed-crust pizza among ‘em). Then there were things to do avoiding alcohol–shows at the Akron Civic Theatre ( ballet, a ventriloquist, stunt dogs ???), appointments at a selfie studio (Wait ! That’s a thing?)–somebody out there has an inflatable photo booth; and there’s more, my favorite being ax-throwing. Well, there’s something that probably would best be done without the influence of alcohol. Am I right? The location mentioned was someplace called TimberBeast in Medina. Medina sure has changed since I was growing up (As have a number of things, admittedly). They have also got a trailer selling goods for “all your mobile ax-throwing needs.” Ha ! The article goes on to list places where one can go to get in shape–love the names : Welcome to the Pit, Fit Life Gym, Ripp City Fitness, Get Fit 24, Tyrannosaurus Flex Fitness.
But wait ! There’s more! Lots more family-style activities–a roller rink (We have one of those!), So So Artsy Paint & Sip Studios, Stonehenge ( bowling, lunar bowling–what’s that?, arcade games, miniature golf in the summer–have to wait for that), ice skating–don’t try the creek, go commercial, at least somebody checks the ice and you don’t wind up knee deep in mud, Fun ‘n’ Stuff–indoor bumper cars, laser tag, mini roller coaster (you can bring your own cake to eat if you’re doing a celebration). And, finally–Cuyahoga Valley Art Center, Twinsburg Karate Institute, Creative Motion Studios–dance stuff, Long Tall Knits (It’s all about fiber. ) I tried to learn to knit once but after I got the “knit” stitch, nobody thought it was good enough to go on to “perl”, I went off and did something else. I did have the best apron in Lorain County once, though…just thought I’d mention that. And the finale to the piece was the mention of Marie’s Patisserie, where you can learn to make cinnamon rolls and all of the things that you’re trying to avoid scarfing down because it would be breaking your New Year’s resolutions.
Sounds good to me.
