When someone realizes that their child has a problem with alcohol or drugs, they often start by asking the question – How did we get here? Sometimes there is a quick answer…sometimes it feels nearly impossible to answer. The tricky part is, often times, alcohol and drug use is only recognized or addressed when it’s already a problem. This is when we find out about all of the things we could have done differently along the way. Anxiety, guilt, and frustration set in. What do we do now? For those who have not been down this road, there are still a few things to think about… a few things to consider.
At Risk? – Who are the adolescents that are most at risk? In all honesty, everyone has some level of risk of using or abusing alcohol and drugs, however, there are some characteristics that tend to increase risk. Included are children who have addiction in their families. Also, children who have mood disorders, and especially those who have experienced trauma. There are so many things that could be listed here. This list is exhaustive and sometimes becomes overwhelming. The reality that everyone has some level of risk is imperative to recognize but also as negative experiences or biological factors add up, the risk increases. Now that I recognize my child is at risk, what do I do?
Prevention – Preventing our children from using alcohol and drugs can seem like a foreign concept. Unless we have been touched by addiction in our own lives in some way, most of us don’t even think about preventing a problem until the problem has occurred. There are, however, several resources and methods of prevention. Having early conversations with your children about alcohol and drugs, how to decline when peers offer, and even practicing those scenarios can be beneficial. Also, the use of outside resources can be helpful as well. Portage County has a wealth of prevention professionals that can assist parents through school programming for example. These programs are designed to be fun and engaging as well as informative. It is highly encouraged that parents reach out to schools to find out about prevention services offered there.
Recognition of Current Use – Sometimes, we find ourselves in the panic inducing situation when we find out our kids are already experimenting with or regularly using alcohol and/or drugs. How did we miss the signs? What are the signs? Again, the signs of adolescent alcohol and drug use can be difficult. Behavior and attitude changes in adolescence are already difficult to follow. If you are noticing a change in peer group, lack of grooming, decline in academic performance, loss of or change in interests, deteriorating relationships with family members and other important relationships, or general lack of regard for rules and boundaries, you may start asking yourself, “Is it possible that my child is using drugs or alcohol?, how do I ask my child? Be direct. Talk to your child when you and your child are calm. Allow your child to talk to you. Ask open-ended questions. Let your child know what you are seeing from them that led to your concerns. Avoid punishment. As counterintuitive as it seems, punishment such as taking away a phone or video games, can halt communication. Instead set clear boundaries and expectations, and provide consequences for not following through.
Does my child need treatment? – As parent’s we try to protect our children. We don’t want our child to be labeled. We don’t want to “make the situation worse.” If you begin asking if your child needs treatment, your family interventions probably have not been as successful as you’ve hoped. Don’t stress yourself, or your family, out any further. Get a diagnostic assessment. Have a professional help you make that determination. Remember, an assessment happens first. After the assessment, a recommendation will be made, and you and your family get to make the decision of whether or not to enter treatment. Making that first call for an assessment does not mean you are giving up any control. You and your family will be a part of the entire assessment and treatment process no matter how far it goes and how long it lasts.
Children’s Advantage has a team of committed, highly trained, and supportive staff ready to support your family with ongoing recovery and building a healthier home environment for the whole family. Children’s Advantage has immediate telehealth appointments available, please call our office at 330-296-5552.
