Well, it may have been July 4th, but it definitely was a first in a lot of ways…just like what’s going on all over the place lately. How bizarre to have virtually no public displays of fireworks for Independence Day. The locals did try to take up the slack, I notice, as there were booms, bangs and flashes going on for quite a major portion of the evening. Heaven help the poor dogs and children who were scared out of their britches by the uproar. Even back in better days when I would go up to Hiram to see the displays there, I never could understand why people would bring their dogs or toddlers to such an event. Why would they do the fireworks at home and terrify their pets? The animals have hearing so much more acute than we dull humans that all of that loudness is actually painful; besides, the intensity of the light show erupting all around erratically is a source of considerable, not irrational, fear. Neither the kids–at least the little ones–nor the animals, can grasp the concept of all this pain and/or commotion being something entertaining. You want to entertain your kid or your dog? Go for the warm-fuzzies and something to eat. Skip the whole flash-bang scene.
And, I’ll bet that goes for the neighbors as well. Big noises in the backyard (It is never confined to just the 4th. It goes on for days) are not what most people want to hear in the middle (or the beginning or the end) of the night. The perpetrators of this cacophony will always say, “ Aww, it’s just once a year. Aww, it’s just a little noise. Aww, it’s not hurting anybody.”
Let’s take that last one first, “Aww, it’s not hurting anybody.” ‘Fraid not. Emergency rooms and fire departments everywhere will dispute that. Serious injuries always spike right around the beginning of July, trailing off as the munitions run out. Burns abound, injuries to eyes and ears, hands and faces, combustibles combusting where least expected when exposed to drifting sparks–fun times, right? Leave it to the pro’s, I say. Not to mention the expense and emergency prep (Do you know who in your neighborhood suffers from PTSD?)that should be in place.
And don’t forget : If you bought those fireworks in Ohio, you’re required to sign a paper stating that you will take them out of state to set them off. Ha! Known colloquially as the “Liars’ Law”, it is the result of our omniscient (and spineless) state legislatures over time being willing to trade public safety for commercial activity and popularity. The phrase, “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” comes to mind…and to the emergency room.
Large gatherings of all sorts were (One hopes) in short supply to avoid spreading the contagion. In addition to the community fireworks displays, the parades and band concerts got X-ed out all over. HOWEVER, the Garrettsville-Hiram community was treated to a rag-tag Covid 19
Flash-mob Band performance on Saturday afternoon at three locations–Sky Plaza in front of the IGA, Garfield Plaza in front of the movie theatre, Hiram in front of the Post Office. It was a hoot! The volunteer musicians numbered somewhere around twelve–covered quite a few parts, including a bass guitar subbing in for a missing tuba–the number could have been larger but the ad hoc nature of the whole project was a definite obstacle, as was the fact that the usual (Hiram College) practice facilities were not available and the music to be played had to come from the individual computers/printers of the musicians. Luckily, as my computer was not speaking to my printer and as I can’t read percussion music anyway, I just followed my usual procedure as a virtuoso player of the bass drum, I just try to get the beat from the conductor–what a
concept!–or from the tuba(bass guitar) and whaled away at the poor, unsuspecting instrument. As the only instrumentalist there whose mouth was not otherwise occupied by the playing, I was the solo voice heard during the National Anthem. Talk about wailing! No one “took a knee” in protest, so I guess that I probably couldn’t be heard.
It was sunny and hot but a dedicated fan base–mostly family and friends, with a few curious shoppers–came to listen and see everyone get sunburned to a fare-thee-well. Many thanks to our audiences and an invitation to other daring souls to join us next year in happier times…always looking for snare drummers.
And speaking of temperatures(another great segue)…. I heard a joke by Tom Hanks on the radio the other day. A man bought a parrot which could speak; but he took it back to the pet shop, complaining that the bird was terribly foul-mouthed. The pet shop owner told him that since parrots were tropical birds, they disliked cold, so every time the bird launched into a scatological episode, the man should put him in the freezer. The next outburst came, into the freezer the bird went. When he was taken out, the parrot apologized profusely for his language, then asked, “What did the chicken do?”
Indeed.
