Rumors of my demise have been wildly overwrought.
For the few of you who missed the News of the World, Nightly News, and MSNBC special on current events–I have indeed been cruisin’ the ‘Ville accessorized with an arm sling, not to mention the accompanying blue language involved in getting the da- – -d thing on so that it can do its job. The sling itself is not the problem. Once on, it holds things in place pretty well. The trick is, that a single individual has great difficulty–bordering on the impossible–positioning and fastening all of the blinking straps and handles and padding and Velcro (wonderful stuff when it works; a pain in the patootie when trying to coordinate more than two pieces at a time) all over the place. I have sought help in getting myself properly wrapped (Sort of like a Christmas present in July–but I neither sparkle nor jingle) all over town, including a group of yoga class participants and one of the friendly store personnel, er, persons down at Rite Aid. Luckily, I figured out that I was never going to be able to sleep while wearing this contraption–straps & buckles are not sleep-inducing–so I found another velcro-based apparatus that worked just fine. Ibuprofen contributed as well, and it was off to the Land of Nod in no time.
The origin of all this was my morning walk on Friday (7/29/22). On Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, my route goes from Park Ave. to Liberty St. to Windham St. to Freedom St. to South St. to Main St. to the Boardwalk(Did I tell you about the bike trekkers who were sleeping in the gazebo one morning? Maybe another time.)then back to Freedom St. and Windham St. to Center, Maple, and Park Ave. Tuesdays and Thursdays are another story. Anyway, that particular Friday, I was tootling along and caught the edge of some sidewalk concrete and went down onto the grass–lucky it wasn’t the concrete. Hit the knee–no surprise there–and the right shoulder. The minute that I started to get up, I said to myself, “Collarbone!” Can I call ‘em or what? There was bleeding going on but it could have been worse (and has, upon occasion); the shoulder had twinges but nothing major, so I finished my walk and went home, then to the Y(The crew there is my go-to medical consultancy and rescuers.). Then I took myself to the Rite-Aid and purchased an Ace sling and figured that would do the trick. Ha! Think again, Florence Nightingale.
It was decided (me protesting) that I should seek medical attention, so my personal EMS outfit took me off to the Crystal Clinic in Kent (on the recommendation of one with considerable experience with orthopedic crises). The staff there was very helpful, asked questions, took X-rays, and guess what she said? “Collarbone.” Who knew? From there on out it was standard collarbone treatment, which is to say, another appointment on Friday to check on the progress of knitting up bones, and a new, MUCH BETTER sling. How do we know that it was MUCH BETTER? The Ace sling cost $20–tops. The Crystal Clinic sling was written up as $251. See! Much better.
Anyway, all of this drama did not dampen the turn-out for the big birthday bash on Sunday. Aaron King brought his snow-cone trailer, to the delight of all fanciers of the “Zombie Virus” flavor. Mike Patterson brought his “Sloppy Dawgs” food truck to wow the gourmands among us. The Farm Girl kitchen brought a great cookie mix tray. Camera Culinary aced the place with truly superior cupcakes. Nobody left hungry, that’s for sure.
Great weather, wonderful help, setting up and taking down. Amazing crowd–people I see every day, people I haven’t seen in years, former students–and their children, a relative who actually admits to being a family member, guests from Florida, guests from California–heckuva party!
If you missed it, you might have to wait for another five years to see if I can still remember when my birthday is and whether I want to celebrate it in “the home.” If I do, you’re all invited…again. And thanks so much, all of you for being “ the wind beneath my wings.”
