The Return of Champ
“Home is the sailor, home from sea, and the hunter home from the hill.” With apologies to Robert Louis Stevenson, I believe that we can remove the sea from consideration in this case (Camp Creek down behind the back yard hardly qualifies as anything like “the bounding main.” It doesn’t even come up to the level of Lake Erie.),...
Homeowners: Your House Must Be Sold TWICE!
In today’s housing market, where supply is very low and demand is very high, home values are increasing rapidly. Many experts are projecting that home values could appreciate by another 5%+ over the next twelve months. One major challenge in such a market is the bank appraisal. If prices are surging, it is difficult for appraisers to find adequate,...
Ain’t That The Way
Ain’t that just the way…. There I am, driving home from a place that I’ve never been before, after dark, with directions quite different from the ones that got me there, those, thankfully, having been researched by an usher at church (during the service?); Divine Providence all the way, considering the amount of construction going on in the neighborhood—potholes anyone?...
How old do you think Nelson Ledges is?
Understanding the concept of time in seconds, minutes, days, years, and even centuries is easy for us to comprehend. However, the concept of geologic time is very hard for most of us to wrap our brain around. How can you put into perspective 4.6 billion years, the estimated age of the earth? Let’s try. It would take you...
Casey At The Bat
Er…actually, it was Grimmy—Grimalkin, to be more formal—who was , so to speak, “at the bat”, and I don’t mean any kind of ballgame, base or soft. No, no it was a real bat, die Fledermaus, as Richard Wagner put it, and it was in my shoe (Plenty of room in there). Grimmy was after a bat. And here’s...
Kool Porch Kitties
Well, it had to happen. The porch kitties now have a fan base. Can a world tour be far behind? As you may have noticed, it’s been pretty d----d cold outside lately. And despite the heated, insulated luxury boxes on the front porch for the cats, there were some temperature-related issues confronting me and the denizens of the aforementioned boxes,...
Trying To Embrace The Dating Dot Coms Part 3 of a Series
Why do people get hooked up with on-line dating services like EEK-Grominy and Lighter Dot Com. Well, if you believe all the hype shown you in the 90 second TV commercials it is because you want to find the right partner, that special someone, someone to marry. Of course it is also possible that maybe you just want to...
Random Observations
A Word to the Wise…. There’s a new restaurant –reported on in The New Yorker—that you might want to think twice about patronizing this month (or any other month, if you ask me ). It’s in Paris, for one thing, not exactly on our regular circuit of dining experiences (anyplace over twenty miles away seldom makes the cut), but...
SCORE !
Well , it’s not just about football, ya know. Or volleyball or baseball or cross country or golf or soccer or any of those sports where you get all sweaty. Much more refined than THAT. Specifically, it’s the Sinquefield Cup Chess Tournament. Held this last week in St. Louis, MO, the event saw a stunning performance by Fabiano Caruana, a...
Don’t Look Now
Don’t look now, but the crazy stuff is still out there…and I don’t mean snow. That fickle pair, Punxsutawney Phil and Buckeye Chuck have predicted six more weeks of winter, so it’s pretty “old hat” by now ( a phrase that has transitioned from meaning something fairly pornographic in the 1700’s to just being considered a slangy way of...
Minks and Otters
As promised, we will continue up the family tree of the toughest family on the block, the Mustelids. This week we will be discussing the “middle “children of the family. But make no mistake, they are just as tough, fearless, and bloodthirsty as their siblings. Next time we will discuss the big boys, the Martens, Fishers, and Wolverines. Now...
A Load Off My Mind
Well, that’s a load off my mind! There was a piece in the AB-J and there have been subsequent mentions on NPR and even online about the possibility of a new “snack sensation” to be known as “lady Doritos”. Apparently, a clueless CEO at overeating icon, Pepsico, said in a podcast that women, unlike men, don’t like to lick their...
Favorite Son
This commonly-used political term came to mind the other day when my mom sent me a clipping from our local newspaper back in Wellington (Lorain County, west of here on St. Rtes. 58 & 18), either the Elyria Chronicle-Telegram or the Wellington Enterprise—I really didn’t check. In politics, the term usually refers to an up-and-coming sort that has aspirations...
April Showers…Spring Flowers…
“The flowers that bloom in the Spring—Tra-La!”…or words to that effect. At least some of the bulbs and roots that I have planted around here did not fall prey to the squirrels’ depredations during the rather severe—for squirrels, at least—winter we have only lately emerged from. There are blossoms that I don’t recognize from last year and some that do...
Bats & The Queen
The season is on! Which season? Football, Volleyball, Cross Country, Golf, Soccer...you name it; the sticks and the balls and the nets, the helmets, the hitting, the sweat—all ramping up for participants and fans alike. And others.... Came home after the football game the other night—which, by the way, could have been played on top of the hinges of hell,...
Fiscal Fashions
So...I’m listening to a radio program called “Marketplace” and discovered an interesting idea from some economic guru—Michael Bloomburg or Warren Buffett or some such multimillionaire. Whoever this dude was, he said that he frequently followed the MUI—the Men’s Underwear Index(not to be confused with the Modern University of Information and Technology or the Multilingual User Interface)—when deciding the type...
Why is a new ship christened with a bottle of champagne?
The caller on phone line number two wanted to know, “Why is a new ship christened with a bottle of champagne?” This is one of those practices that the Newton Falls Public Library staff is aware of, but never really thought of the reason behind it. Page 791 of Popular Beliefs and Superstitions: a compendium of American folklore: from the...
Deal Of A Lifetime
Such a deal I had for you! Could have had ‘em just like that. But no, nobody stepped up to get in on the giveaway. Ask me nice and maybe arrangements can be made. Bargains! Freebies! They’ll be going fast, lemme tell ya. What’s that? Some timid, unadventurous soul asks what the hubbub is about. What’s being given away? Well,...
Feedback and Food For Thought
We are some six weeks into this topic of 65 and Single Again. I have gotten a great deal of feedback about the articles via e-mail, over the phone, and more often than not, in person. A great many people seem to identify with this predicament of life. The column mirrors their struggle and they are searching for solutions. As well, it has generated a good bit of thought on my part, re-thinking certain things, postulating new, and contemplating where to go next.
Why Have Interest Rates Jumped to a 7-Year High?
Interest rates for a 30-year fixed rate mortgage have climbed from 3.95% in the first week of January up to 4.61% last week, which marks a 7-year high according to Freddie Mac. The current pace of acceleration has been fueled by many factors. Sam Khater, Freddie Mac’s Chief Economist, had this to say: “Healthy consumer spending and higher commodity prices spooked...
News Flash!
Here’s a news flash : Tbilisi, Georgia (the former Soviet Union region, not the Peachtree State): “Sausage-wielding extremists” (There’s a phrase to ponder, right?) invade a vegan café –Café Kiwi--during a film festival in the neighborhood and proceeded to fling meat and fish at the café patrons. The ten to fifteen men, wearing sausages around their necks and waving skewers...
Forsooth!
The Settlers “Ye Old” State Renaissance Faire has shuffled off into history once again, leaving bags of gold for the Middlefield “Shop With a Cop” program and the “Middlefield Cares! Food Cupboard”. Generous supporters included the Nauvoo Family Market, White House Chocolates, Alley’s Grille, Mary Yoder’s Kitchen, Zeppe’s Pizzaria, EarthLight Art Source, Mangia! Mangia! and The Ghosts of Burton...
“What makes a rock maple table different from a regular maple table?”
“What makes a rock maple table different from a regular maple table?” The Newton Falls Public Library staff began their investigation in the library’s woodworking books. We found a complete list of various woods with photographs and descriptions in The Complete Manual of Woodworking by Albert Jackson, David Dan and Simon Jennings, p. 26. There are two kinds of...
Haunts At Home
With Halloween coming up and all, I think that I’ll have to admit that I think that the house seems to be haunted. Not just by the bats who make periodic appearances (Though not—can I hear some knocking on wood out there—just lately) thupp-thupping around inside the place, from living room to dining room to kitchen and...
If It Isn’t One Thing…
If it isn’t one thing, it’s another. We’ve finally seen the end of the political ads (Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?—Robert Orben). The signs should all be picked up until the next go-round and we can listen to the moans of the losers...
A Bad Spell
It wasn’t pretty. The brain trust here at the Weekly Villager sallied forth to adventures in orthography by participating in the22nd Annual Community Spelling Bee for Literacy, co-sponsored by the Portage County Literacy Coalition Community Partners at the NEOMED Conference Center on Friday, May 24, 20013. And fourth…maybe fifth… was about where we wound up…out of five. Like lots of vital...
The Name Game
Speaking of winter storms.... This whole naming thing apparently started with the Weather Channel and a Latin class somewhere. This was apparently so that the on-screen prognosticators could get us all to focus on a particular weather event at a particular time and to nudge us toward acknowledging the fact that all of this weather stuff is related rather...
The End
O.K. So I want to invite everyone to the second annual M-O-M / T-A-T (Machine -O-Mania / Touch-A-Truck) coming up--rain or shine-- on Sunday, May 22 from 10:00 to 2:00 at J. A. Garfield H.S.; admission: adults--$5.00, kids--$3.00. It’s a fund-raiser for the Garfield Academic Challenge team, the QuizMasters, and gives kids of all ages a chance to see...
The machines are out to get me!
Does a computer count as a machine or a device? Matters not, they’re after me. So I’m sitting at the computer typing away at my much-anticipated column for this week, when, out of the blue—or whatever color cyberspace is nowadays—the screen went black (that color I know) and totally unresponsive. I wiggled and jiggled various plugs and...
Welcome To The Lifeboat; Please Come Aboard
What do you do when, at 67 you find yourself single and alone again? The reasons for this often include, your mate passed away, or perhaps you and/or your mate decided to end a 1-40 year relationship for whatever reasons. At any rate you are now alone in the house, responsible for everything. Assuming that bereavement is an ongoing...
